thatgrrrl's Diaryland Diary


update schmupdate

Followup to last night: we talked, and it went amazingly well. It was a fairly brief discussion, but I'm pretty sure I covered everything that's going on, up to now. Well, except that I'd already seen the one guy's ad that I think is someone I know. I'll disclose that today. I'm not sure what his response will be to that, whether it will be the typical "not a good idea to get involved with someone you work with" or "he's a known quantity and not part of the scene so that's ok".

Anyway, I began by bringing up the profile on bondage dot com, and why I was doing that, and what I was going to be looking for, and how I was keeping him informed from the beginning this time. His response to that was brief: ok. He did say that he probably would have brought it up, and he'd figured that I was looking when I told him about the profile, but I'm skeptical that he would have brought it up himself. But whatever, it doesn't matter.

I talked about when NS moves down here (probably in June) he would have a lot more physical contact with her than now, and I would feel a lot more unequal. I said I didn't anticipate our physical relationship changing much in the future (he agreed with that), and that I don't want to change the status quo with respect to me and him.

Then he talked about wanting me to be careful, and him checking out the person, and asking around to people he knows in the scene about the person. He said he'd rather it was a woman than a man, because a lot of the men he knows in the scene around here are predators. He wants me to go SLOW, and reserves the right to pull me back if he thinks I'm going too fast. Because he knows my tendency for obsession.

As an example of that, last night, when lying in bed waiting to fall asleep, I went through about 100 different scenarios about how it might go with the guy from work, who, I believe, I will call SD from here on out. Got that? SD = guy from work with the ad on bondage dot com that I am 89% compatible with. Please make a note of it.

Also, one of the songs from the concert that I went to Friday night with C and Susan kept playing through my head. Actually, two of them. And no, I haven't written about the concert. You didn't miss that entry. The singer was Tret Fure, and she was GREAT. It was a small venue, probably less than 100 people, very intimate, and she was wonderful. I'd never heard her sing before, but I'd heard OF her, through friends. I loved it, and she made me cry with several of her songs, they were so powerfully emotional. I bought her new CD (of course) and listened to it on the 45 minute drive home from the concert. Great stuff. Highly recommended. Kind of a folk-rock acoustic guitar blend. Such a strong voice.

Oh, and did I mention HOT??? Yes, she was HOT. Black jeans and t-shirt with the arms cut off, and nicely muscled. Lean. Slurpily hot. Yeah.......

Anyway, back to bondage dot com and SD. I've marked about 8 people for my 'hotlist' that I've browsed, but I'm not sure what happens next. I'm a free member, so I can't email people directly. I'm not sure whether the people that I"ve put on my hotlist get notified that 'someone has added you to their hotlist' or not. I would hope they do.

Included in the 100 scenarios mentioned above were the possibility of asking him to go to lunch with me, and disclosing my knowledge and interest at that point. How would I approach that? In disclosing my own knowledge, I'd have to disclose where I was and what I was doing. But what if it's not his ad? I'm 99.75% positive it is, but what if there's a person out there who looks JUST like him? I suppose if I just ask him if SD means anything to him (his name on the site), without disclosing anything else about where I found that, that would work.

Anyway, enough of that for now. Today I'm going to meet another BookCrosser to trade books: I'm getting The Gilded Chamber by Rebecca Kohn for The Bad Place by Dean Koontz. We're meeting at 4pm today, so I'm going to go visit C and Susan for a little while before that, because they live close to where I'm meeting her to do the deal. Like we're meeting up for a drug deal or something. ;) Before that, I have to go to the grocery store and get dogfood, or the poor CDog will be starving tonight. (yeah, right).

Also, I've got 2 other trades to send out on Monday, I'm getting Caretakers by Tabitha King for Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin, and I'm getting Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers by Mary Roach for The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time by Mark Haddon.

Couple interesting matchups there. The first one, today's trade, both titles are places and both authors last names start with K. The third one, both have Curious in the title, and the first names of the authors differ only by one letter. Nothing springs out with the second trade though.

Anyway, now it's time to roam the house and set clocks forward that didn't set themselves.

8:00 a.m. - 2005-04-03


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